The Power of Humility...

I will begin by sharing with you one incident from my life. This relates to the time when I started studying for my CA-Final. The classes had just begun and all the people were new to each other. So there was a boy sitting next to me in the hall. We started discussing about how the teachers of these coaching institutions are busy as there are so many students studying for CA. Then he said that it is quite impossible for these teachers to even know the names of all the students.

At that time, I told him that all the teachers knew me very well. I told him that I was a rank holder in the intermediate exam. I told him that I have a rather good acquaintance with all the teachers and many CAs of the city. I kept on talking about myself without even bothering to know about him.

Few days later, I saw a list of top 10 rank holders from that coaching institution. I wasn’t in that list. But I saw the photograph of the same person to whom I was speaking so highly about myself. I had got 43^rd rank in the exam, and I thought I was the best. I told him everything about myself. And then I realised that he was 9^th in the list – way better than I was.

That was the first time I properly understood the power of humility.

Being humble makes people respect us

I remember this incident even today. I could not stop appreciating the humility of that person.

What did he have to do? He just had to say that he was also a rank holder. I would have been quiet at that very moment. But he chose not to speak it. He chose to stay quiet even when I was praising myself. And that is something I never forgot even today. He was humble, and so I respect him.

But sadly, I had not learnt enough at that time. Two years when later I started my job, something similar happened. I met people who were new to me. They were far more intelligent than me. And I took time to realise that. But now, thankfully, I have understood one thing. If we are humble – people respect us. If we are proud about ourselves – people ignore and avoid us.

The easiest way to be humble

Jessie Duarte was a personal assistant to Nelson Mandela in the 1990s. Recently after the sad demise of Mandela, she said the following words about Nelson Mandela.

“He always made his own bed, no matter where we traveled. I remember we were in Shanghai, in a very fancy hotel, and the Chinese hospitality requires that the person who cleans your room and provides you with your food, does exactly that. If you do it for yourself, it could even be regarded as an insult.

So in Shanghai I tried to say to him, ‘Please don’t make your own bed, because there’s this custom here.’ And he said, ‘Call them, bring them to me.’

So I did. I asked the hotel manager to bring the ladies who would be cleaning the room, so that he could explain why he himself has to make his own bed, and that they not feel insulted. He didn’t ever want to hurt people’s feelings. He never really cared about what great big people think of him, but he did care about what small people thought of him.”

If Nelson Mandela was so humble, even after having done so much, why can’t we?

I believe that the biggest and the most efficient way to achieve humility is – to remind ourselves that we have nothing to be proud of. What have we achieved? What is so good about our lives? We must acknowledge the fact that nothing is permanent. Whatever we have with us is because God has bestowed it upon us. It is the greatness of Him and many more people in our lives which has brought us to this stage. And the sooner we realise this, the better we will be.

Experimenting with humility

We can probably never be as great as Mandela. Therefore, while it is very easy to quote instances from his life and appreciate him, it is very difficult to apply them in our lives. Therefore, let us be more practical and realistic instead of being idealistic. So how can we practice humility in our lives?

1) First, we can stop speaking too much about ourselves. This is the biggest lesson I learnt about being humble. People are not interested in how great our achievements may be. People are always interested in what difference we have made in their lives. Believe me – we can tell everyone about all the things that we have achieved. The only response everybody will give is – why should I care?

2) Second, and more important, we should take time to notice the good things about everyone else, and compliment them genuinely. Every person has a unique quality. Every individual is different. Therefore, we must always observe the good things in people and try to learn from them. Everyone likes finding mistakes in what others do. But if we simply talk about how the other people are wrong, we will never improve as a person. J

So, the next time I praise myself, or think less of any individual – I will just think, “Nobody will remember me for what I have achieved. Everyone will remember me for what I have contributed”

May everyone live a happy and peaceful life! May everyone keep on smiling!

Regards,

Palkesh